Smelly and Mo Almost Chew Their Last Cord

Smelly and Mo are almost 6 years old, which means I've had 6 years to learn my lesson. But do we ever really learn our lesson until we lose something we truly love? Well last night I almost did lose something I truly love, my Dyson DC28 Vacuum.

You'd think after the long list of things the cats have destroyed by means of chewing, I would not leave the vacuum out in the open with the cord exposed (even though it was nicely wound up). But, I'm not gonna lie, I thought maybe the cats grew out of their chewing on cords stage. Like they grew out of their habit of knocking glasses of water over.

Turns out they didn't, and upon putting my new vacuum away last night after owning it for less than a week, I see this!

Luckily, for Smelly and Mo, the vacuum still works, so they have not chewed their last cord. Luckily for me, I learned that the cord can be replaced for about $20. But, will I ever learn my lesson?

Anti Icky Poo Poo Saves the Day

I've officially found the best pet cleaning product known to man, and it has the best name... Anti Icky Poo Poo. I kid you not.

You may be wondering why I needed to go on a search for the best pet cleaning product to begin with, or you may not care, but I'm going to tell you anyway. Upon introducing Misty to Penny and Lola, things seemed... okay. Granted there were scars and lots of fighting we figured they would work it out.

I slowly started to smell cat urine around the house. Anyone who has ever owned a cat knows it's the most miserable smell on the planet. Long story short, miss Lola had been spraying everywhere. When I say everywhere, I mean EVERYWHERE. Places that you wouldn't even think a cat could spray... walls, carpet, window sills, sinks, and by far the worst the air vents!

I have to give Lola minor credit for the air vents because I think she knew that if she pissed in one, it would be smelt throughout... clever little bitch I like to call my Lola.

So upon realizing my cat was slowly ruining my parents new condo I went on a hunt for anything to clean up this smell. Let me tell you what didn't work so you don't waste your time:

- vinegar (it just smelt like urine and vinegar)
- mouthwash (smelt like minty urine)
- vinegar mixed with hydrogen peroxide (just didn't work)
- every product featured at PetSmart (sorry PetSmart, even though I think some PetSmarts have Anti Icky Poo Poo)
- Borax
- Baking soda
- Ultra Intense carpet cleaner
- steam cleaner

So naturally, out of desperation, I googled "my cat is peeing in my air vents" (never thought I'd ever say or type that statement). It turns out Lola is not the only bitchy feline out there!

After reading a ton of forums I came across someone who mentioned Anti Icky Poo Poo. They talked about how they had owned 13 cats or something that makes me look WAY less like a crazy cat lady and how this product was the only thing that truly took care of the smell and stains. They even claimed it got rid of stains from past cats, we're talking years! I didn't believe it. But I was desperate so I ordered it off of Amazon.

Needless to say, this stuff works. Like a charm! It's incredible. It removed ALL of the smells from everywhere Lola had peed.  They even have a carpet injector, which is a crazy needle concoction that you stick into your carpet through to the padding underneath to eliminate the smell from underneath the rug. (Brilliant seeing as this is where the smells stay)

So Anti Icky Poo Poo officially saved the day, and continues to save the day. Maybe I can write them a testimonial and send in a photo of Lola and suggest her as their new mascot?

Kitty Catch-Up - Smelly and Mo Get a New Housemate

Smelly and Mo have been very busy since we last posted. Lola has been running stairs to lose all that weight (she hasn't been back to the vet but I think she is looking slimmer and more acceptable for photos).

Here's some other stuff you've missed...

They moved down by the river (don't worry I moved with them)...

They watched the snow fall out the bedroom window...

Their boyfriend moved in (okay lets get real, my boyfriend moved in)  but what's mine is theirs so he's lucky enough to have moved in with three ladies instead of one!

Lola took a nap with mom...

Penny tried to fit in a pan...

Lola took a nap with mom...

Penny took a nap against some clothes...

They changed foods. Mainly because our past food got recalled for Salmonella: Diamond Cat Food Recall -- YIKES!
They now eat Nature's Recipe. Side note: I'm a firm believer in feeding your pets healthy food!

Penny tried to fit in a lunch box...

Last, but certainly not least, the biggest change Smelly and Mo have gone through is they got a new housemate! No I didn't go extra crazy cat lady. Derek has a cat named Misty  and just like Penny and Lola are my baggage, Misty is Derek's baggage.

The long and short of it, Smelly and Mo hate their new roommate. After trying to introduce the cats I thought "I should have blogged about this" and it was such a failure that I have to start over, so this time I'm documenting this madness.

The last time included, hissing, growling, chasing, fighting, blood, pee and a lot of kitty anger. We're hoping this time goes better. Stay tuned for the adventures of Smelly, Mo and Mitters, it's going to be hairy, to say the least.

Just so you know what to expect, after round 1 Misty got the nickname "Scar Face"

Penny and Lola won't let any feline in their space without a fight, time to throw down.

"Wow That's a Biiiiiig Girl"

It seemed like the perfect time to blog again seeing as the last time I blogged is when Lola had to go to the vet and recently we had yet another exciting vet experience. However, this time it was for a routine check up.

After waiting in the lobby of the vet for an hour and a half while Penny and Lola rotted away in a kennel too small for both of them and a mean oversized Jack Russell named Mercedes snarled at my poor cats, we finally got called into the docs office. Penny being the social (or as I call her, whore of a kitty) that she is, immediately exited the kennel and was rubbing up on the veterinary assistant the counters the floors the computer, everything. Lola was a bit more skeptical. So I dragged Lola out of her kennel and put her on the counter where the veterinary assistant proceeded to pick her up and say "wow that's a biiiiiiiggg girl." Luckily Lola does not need to understand English because I was offended enough for the both of us. How dare she call my precious cat fat! Then she had the nerve to take Lola in the back, weigh her and come tell me she has gained a pound! You might be saying big woop a pound, but in kitty weight that is a lot! That'd be like a 115 pound person gaining 10 pounds. The worst part was I immediately knew exactly what the problem was, me. I had gone and turned my cat into a heffer. (Can I just add that according to Urban Dictionary heffer means "a really fat bitch." This is so true, Lola already was a bitch and now she's fat!

To make matters worse, the vet then took Penny back to get weighed (who she was already favoring for her whorish behavior) and came back to tell me that she'd lost weight! So now Lola is a bitch, a heffer, and food hog. I'd like to say for the first time, I feel like I've failed as a parent, but lets get real, I believe I failed when I let Penny get knocked up, or let the cats eat a Victoria Secret bra, spill water all over my roommates MAC laptop or maybe even when I started a blog about my cats. Either way, it's diet time folks.

**I will not be posting pictures of the heffer until she is back down to her normal weight.

The Dilemmas of Being a Mom

I can only assume that sometimes having a pet is like having a child. Most real parents would probably laugh at that statement but at my ripe age of 25, Smelly and Mo are the closest things to kids that I have and that I want. With that said, lately Lola has proven to be more like a child than ever.

With an uneasy stomach, a drooling mouth and a pathetic look, Lola has been sweeping the apartment with piles of vomit since Thursday. In true cat mom form I didn't worry at first because all animals throw up a little every once in a while, however, it is now Tuesday and Lola has thrown up about 15 times since Thursday, so I've gone from calm cat mom to crazy paranoid cat mom. I'm not going to sit here and tell you vomit details, but in an attempt to try and relate this blog to some regular things that are happening in my life and things not necessarily ALWAYS related to Penny and Lola I just found it interesting the things I've learned from this vomiting experience.

The first is that even though I didn't birth her (because that would be creepy), Lola definitely feels like my child. I find myself worrying about her, feeling helpless because I don't know how she's feeling, doing things like feeding her chicken broth, rushing to Petsmart at 8:45 before it closes at 9 to get her hair ball formula, shoving the hair ball formula down her throat because the whole "rub it on their paw" thing is a joke, following her around to lay down paper towels when she throws up and calling everyone I know to get advice on what to do. I'm like a new mother with a sick baby. But what can we do? Neither of the cats have ever been this sick before, so it appears that a vet visit is in the near future, but in the meantime I'm reflecting on this experience with a few life affirmations.

One: I am not ready for real children, I don't enjoy my things being thrown up on but I guess I should be thankful it wasn't on me.

Two: Animals really are family members

Three: Google might have the answer to everything but it will also scare the crap out of you before it solves anything.

As I sit in bed and as Lola sits in the sink, I deal with the dilemmas of being a mom. To vet or not to vet? Our children should be priceless but is it worth a $200 vet bill for them to tell me she has hair balls? Like real parenthood (I assume) we have to make these decisions for our kids and hope its the best one, I just hope in the end I've raised good cats.

I can at least thank Lola for her most recent actions which have brought me back to the blogging world.

PRODUCT REVIEW: Smelly and Mo Get a Bath

That's right, bath time! Every animal needs to be bathed. Personally, I've never been one to personally bathe my cats BUT I was given Vet's Best "Waterless Cat Bath" and thought I'd give it a try then review it here on my blog. If you are not familiar with the product or the brand you can visit their website.

I was drawn to this product because it is all natural. I believe we should treat our animals like humans and be aware of what goes in and on their body! Then of course the fact that it was waterless was appealing. So does it work?

I'm going to say YES! I'm not sure how dirty your cat may be, but my cats are indoor cats so they aren't spending their days rolling around in dirt or anything. However, right before I got this product I came home to Penny having a sticky tail that smelt like something familiar. Turned out she had sat on some spilled laundry detergent! So I busted out the waterless cat bath (all you have to do is apply the foam straight to the cat's coat then massage it into their coat and skin). It took a few times to get the laundry detergent out of Smelly's tail but it worked! And she smelt good after.

Now it was time for the full body wash. Let's be honest, cats hate getting baths. Having a waterless product doesn't make them like it anymore but it sure as heck makes it easier. You can do the waterless bath on your cat by yourself. Although it helps to have someone help you apply the foam seeing as you most likely are desperately holding your cat down or as I did, sitting on the cat in hopes they don't run away. Don't worry, no cats were squished or harmed during bath time.

It only took about 5-10 minutes per cat for a full body wash. When I was done I set them free from my death grab and waited for them to dry. Of course, being cats they are going to clean themselves, which they did, but it's okay because the product is natural! They dry in about 10-15 minutes and then it is recommended you brush them, which I did. Now Smelly and Mo look good, smell good and although they acted like it was painful it really wasn't!

Here I am mid-bath! Smelly looks pretty happy eh?

I would recommend this product for anyone looking to save some bucks from taking your cat to the groomer. Plus you don't have to worry about the dreaded phone call (my family received this with our old cat, Kimmy) that says "I'm sorry but your cat was such a bitch we won't take her back!" What is also nice about this product is although you can always get it from the Vet's Best website I was in Petco the other day and they had it there as well, so it is easily accessible for you, easy to use on your cats and a money saver in the end. All in all, bath time was successful.

Smelly and Mo are now sleeping peacefully probably dreaming of the traumatizing act of being sat on and then rubbed down with bath foam.

*Don't worry dog owners, Vet's Best has lots of products for all furry family members!

Smelly and Mo Have a Visitor

Every cat meows, well most cats. There are cats like Lola who meow ALL day long. I'm not kidding she doesn't shut up for anything. I don't even know why she's crying half of the time, I believe it's because she's not getting attention but what kind of cat likes attention every second of every day. Only Lola.

Then there's cats like Penny who try to meow but her voice box isn't so hot so she sounds like a senior kitty, possibly on her death bed.

And lastly there are cats like the orange kitty that has taken a liking to my backyard. His cry is distinct and haunts Penny, Lola and myself. I'm pretty sure it haunts my roommates as well. I'm not sure where he lives, he has no collar on and he hasn't been fixed. (Maybe that's why he lingers around the house because he knows there's two saucy female felines in the house.) As tempted as I am to feed him, I haven't because I don't want him coming back more than he already does. Plus he looks pretty well filled out so I don't think he's been abandoned, I just think he's a wanderer.

So everyday I hear that cry, it comes at weird times, like 3 in the morning. It wakes up everyone (by everyone I mean Penny, Lola and myself of course) and gets Penny and Lola all riled up. They start hissing, growling, trying to jump through the window to get to the lonely boy outside.

I'm glad Penny and Lola have an admirer, and lets be honest, it's probably just Penny, Lola isn't necessarily a head turner. I just hope that orange kitty learns to control the hours he chooses to come for a visit but for now Penny is on the constant look out!

Smelly and Mo Go to Tahoe

It's always an adventure when I decide to pack up the kids and head to grandma and grandpas house. I've learned from several occasions in kitty early years that the cats are better if left roaming the car than trapped in a cat cage. This way they can go where they want, watch the road, and not feel confined.

So the trip started out as it always does, smelling like poop. I'm assuming nerves is what makes each of the cats poop within 2 minutes that the car starts moving. At least they do it in the kitty litter box. I thought this trip was going to be a disaster because I was in my mom's jeep wrangler and it was so windy outside I couldn't hear a siren if it was going off next to me. The cats did surprisingly well, Lola didn't drool like usual and Penny just kinda looked at me every once in a while like "where the hell are you taking us lady."

One of my favorite parts of the ride was when Lola decided to stand up with her paws on the dashboard and I see her head going back and forth back and forth back and forth, only to realize she's mesmerized by the windshield wipers! I tried my best to get a picture of her... you can see her on the right there. She's also being a backseat driver.



Once in Tahoe the cats had a fabulous time as always. The first thing they did was sprint downstairs, I think they instantly remember there is a way for them to be outside at my parents house. Penny was the first to the doggy door (she was probably hoping her babies' daddy would be out there). However she only made it half way out the doggy door before she was stopped by several inches of snow. It was pretty funny watching Penny and Lola walk around the pen, through the snow just to be outside. They would do the whole take a step, pull the paw out, give it a shake, take the next paw out, give it a shake and so on. It looked like they were dancing.

At one point over the weekend I couldn't find Penny and I thought she'd maybe found a way to escape and get cozy with big black kitty but then she appeared! In my closet!



I thought the best part of this was how the hell she got up there. BUT turns out the best part was when she got stuck up there and couldn't find her way back down. Sometimes Penny is not the smartest cat of the litter. She paced back and forth trying to run down the hangers until she finally looked so helpless that I just helped her down. She definitely had the "well shit mom what do I do now look."

It only took a few hours for Lola to follow in Penny's footsteps. They're both up there!



I am convinced that Smelly is the leader and mo is the follower. Penny is much more daring than Lola but I think Lola is smarter for letting Penny check out the situation then she dives in once she knows its safe.

So other than some good sleeping and snow pawing the cats didn't cause too much trouble. There was no broken property and at one point my dad said "so do the cats still chew on weird things like wires, do I need to worry about my computer?" and I was like "well yeah they do but you're fine its just for a day that we're here." Next thing I know my mom is pointing and smiling and there's Lola gnawing on the leaves of one of my dad's fake plants.

Well Lola, thanks for proving me wrong, once again!

Easter Look Alikes

I got this great email today from Jenica... any animal lover has got to like this. I personally like the ones that look just like Smelly and Mo. :)

BEWARE OF IDENTITY THEFT THIS EASTER

I'm not sure who needs to be credited for this but I love it! Happy Easter!

Quiet Days

Well Smelly and Mo have been oddly good lately. Minus the usual mishaps, chewing, scratching, making noise, otherwise they haven't destroyed much. However, every time I do come home the speaker cover is knocked off the speakers from the television. It makes me wonder what they're doing? Or maybe there's another critter hiding? I think they're just scratching away, I mean what else do you do all day as a cat?

However, I have acquired some new pet products which I will be reviewing here on my blog that I'm very excited about. Keep an eye out to hear about Pet Safe Tile and Tub Cleaner, All Purpose Cleaner, a waterless bath foam (oh they love that! -NOT) and an amazing hair brush I got them from Costco! It's all coming up... soon!

For now, I'm enjoying the calm days.

Smelly Hides From the Landlord

Things have been rather mellow around here the last few days. Maybe the cats are still tired from the mouse hunt, which is over, no thanks to Smelly and Mo. But I mean lets be honest, they're trained terror kitties and snugglers, not trained mouse hunters.

So today Smelly embarked on an experimental journey where she was stuck in my car for 5 hours. I know it sounds like animal abuse but it wasn't. The windows were cracked and she had food, water and even a kitty litter box. She spent the afternoon sunbathing on the seat. While Smelly came to work, Mo stayed home and played "good kitty" with the landlord as she did her annual "walkthrough." I had to take Penny in the car because Lola gets a case of the drools when she's in the car, it's rather sad. But Smelly did great, she hung out, no complaints just a "meow" whenever I went to check on her. Now everyone is back home and ready to go to bed. I hope all this calmness isn't a sign of them growing up and taming down their evil ways. That'd be no fun.

In the meantime here's a little video of Smelly and Mo's first time ever in my car...

An Exhausting Mouse Hunt

Every morning as soon as I get up and head to the bathroom, Smelly and Mo are the first ones there to greet me. They sit in the bathroom while I shower, I'm not really sure why, because they're weirdos probably. Anyhoo, so the other day I opened the door and no one came running. This scares me when it happens because that means someone is either locked in somewhere or has managed to get away. So I take a stroll into the kitchen and find the fuzz balls staring intently at the bottom of the stove. They're not moving for anything.

A thought crossed my mind, something of "oh man there's something down there" but I didn't want to think about it. After a long day at work I came home and things seemed to be back to normal. I went to bed around 11 and heard the cats running frantically around the house, I figured they were chasing one of their balls. About a half hour later I was feeling like a snack so I head into the kitchen and there they are staring intently at what I now see is A MOUSE! eeeekkkkkk. And so the mouse hunt begins...

There he was. That little critter. Scared out of his poor mousey guts. The mouse, the cats and I played a small game of curiosity for about a half hour. I don't think Smelly and Mo are natural born mouse hunters, but they were giving it their best shot. After much staring and leaping and going back and forth the mouse finally made a break for the laundry room and safely arrived at his destination, little sneaky critter!

Smelly, Mo and I went to bed.

The next day mouse traps were out all day and night, but no such luck. This time the cats are staring intently at the dishwasher... the mouse was back! The cats spent the next day staring, once again, and so we put down the traps again this time with peanut butter.

Smelly, Mo and I went to bed.

This morning I wake up, once again to no kitties sprinting down the hall. I walk into the kitchen and there they are, staring intently. The peanut butter is gone, but NO MOUSE! It reminds me of that really horrible mouse hunt movie where the mouse is smarter than the humans. I'm starting to feel like this. So after a long day at work I came home and can only believe that Smelly and Mo had a long day of staring... they have yet to learn that looks really don't kill.

Either way, the poor fluff balls are exhausted... and still haven't caught the mouse

They just took off running into the kitchen... maybe the hunt is finally over... stay tuned!

FLASHBACK: Smelly Gets Knocked Up

So whenever the cats take a break from destroying things, which trust me won't happen very often, I'm going to feature FLASHBACKS! These will be adventures from kitty past worth mentioning...

Tonight's FLASHBACK: Smelly Gets Knocked Up

There she is, Smelly, shining in all her beautiful kitten glory. What male kitty wouldn't want to be with her? Well apparently Smelly was too beautiful to resist for one specific male kitty in Lake Tahoe. I had been studying abroad and my parents were watching Smelly and Mo for me. They have an outdoor pen so the kids love going to grandma and grandpas house and getting to be outside.

So I get home from Spain and Smelly is nowhere to be found. After many tears and my mom freaking out thinking that she has lost my cat, turns out Smelly had just found her way out of the cage and was sneaking around with mr. black kitty in the backyard. I watched her one day. She sat on her rock, looking out into the infinite abyss, or really just into the woods and there he came right up to the cage. I'm sure the kitty meows exchanged were something along the lines of "hey pretty lady wanna head into the woods," Smelly (only 9 months old at the time) was probably like "sure you large handsome feline." The rest is history!

Next thing I know Penny is acting weird and having some bodily changes I won't express here. A little google search left me pretty positive that Smelly had done the dirty and she had some buns in the oven!

From here it was just a waiting game. No one was really sure when she got pregnant and it was kinda cool and gross when you could feel the babies moving around in her tummy. I had read that you are supposed to set up "nesting" areas around the house where the cat feels safe and so that's where she'll have her babies. Four "nesting" areas later, Smelly decided to have her babies in the hallway closet on top my towels and blankets. (Thanks Penny)

If you're wondering how you know when your cat is in labor, trust me YOU KNOW. I've never heard such sounds come out of an animal, kind of like when humans have kids! I'll spare you the details of Smelly's delivery but I will say she was a stud of a mom. She didn't try to kill any of her kids and her pregnancy was quick and fairly painless... well for me, looked like it hurt like hell for her.

So out popped... Kanye, Miloh, and Chunk!

They were adorable! It was hard not to keep them all for myself. I was more than thankful that Smelly only had 3 kittens, pretty rare really. She was a great mom. I would try and move the kittens into one of the "nesting" areas but Smelly was never having it, she'd come right over pick them up and take them back to where they were before.

Chunk was given to my brother and he has grown into a beautiful handsome lion...

This doesn't really express his size... seriously he is a lion...

How the hell Penny produced this guy I'll never know. But the point is, not only is Smelly the pretty one but her beautifulness led to her sluttiness. Moral of the story is... Keep large male Felines away from underage kitties.

P.S. Penny must know I was talking smack about her sexual ways because she just came up and sat right on top of the computer... Go ahead Penny this is your world anyway

P.S.S. Miloh and Kanye were both given to close friends and Miloh has been renamed Lua and Kanye has been renamed Kenya. From my understanding they are both doing fabulous

Smelly and Mo Eat Too Much

So I suspected it would be at least 48 hours before I had an adventure to share but looks like the devils have proved me wrong!



First off, let me just say that Penny Lane and Lola's names have changed. It was a natural process that has happened over the last three years. Yes their respective names are "Penny Lane" and "Lola." But I always call Penny Lane "Smelly" and Lola "Mo." There's reasons for this that aren't interesting but now you know that this blog is really the life of SMELLY and MO!

Anyway... So Smelly and Mo went on a bit of a mouse hunt last night, more details to come later, so I was relieved to wake up to kitty normalcy. After being at work for about an hour I get a text message from my roommate saying "Oh goody there's cat vomit everywhere for me to clean up." You may be thinking well come on roomy it's not a big deal, but this is the roomy whose laptop had an entire glass of water spilt on it so to say the least she doesn't share my particular love for the fuzz balls.

I'm assuming she started cleaning the vomit as Smelly and Mo looked on pleased with themselves for finally clearing that crap out of their stomach that was making them feel not so good. They were probably secretly laughing inside that she had to clean it up because they feel her hatred towards them. I told her she didn't have to clean it up but she was nice enough to anyway.

A few minutes later I get another text that says "why did you give them lettuce." Lettuce? What? I'm thinking what the hell I didn't feed them lettuce, in fact I didn't even eat anything green in the last 24 hours. So today's mystery is what are Smelly and Mo really doing at home all day? Maybe they've found their way into the fridge and discovered lettuce is their new favorite food? Nah they're not smart enough for that... MAYBE they figured since they can't wear green for St. Patrick's Day they were just going to barf green instead...I'm gonna say they found a couple day old lettuce (quite possibly a week old) on the floor and ate it right up. Cause that's what cats do, or uh that's what dogs do, but who knows what species I have roaming my house these days.